Courage
by Dancing Through Daisies
Summary: "Courage, that was what KT Rush possessed. It wasn't from fighting off sinners or defeating the sun god Ra and saving the world. No, it was because of something much bigger than that. It was from letting go." / The five times KT Rush reached for Fabian Rutter's hand and the one time she didn't / Kabian relationship throughout the years; Fabina; oneshot


**Hi there everyone! **

**I never really thought of a romantic Kabian relationship until I began reading on FF, so whoever came up with the idea of KT liking Fabian, IT'S A SUPER COOL IDEA! However, ****I can sort of, kind of see KT liking him, but I'm still on the fence about it. However ****I do absolutely _love_ the idea of KT and Fabian being super duper close friends: friends that know each others' secrets and dreams and fears etc.**

**Kabian is adorable, but I will forever be loyal to Fabina. They are perfection :)**

**This piece explores the idea of KT liking Fabian throughout portions of their lives. I like it, so I hope you all do too! :)**

**Enjoy! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own House of Anubis.**

Courage

* * *

**One**

Her first day of senior year was when their hands were introduced to one another.

She noticed how sad he looked, how his head hung low which caused his dark brown locks to fall further over his forehead than they already did. He sat on the edge of his desk chair. His hands were covering his face. There was so much anxiety and sorrow in his aura; KT Rush didn't like to see people sad, even if she hadn't introduced herself to them yet.

She walked up to his half-open doorway and gently tapped on the wood with her knuckles. The boy didn't really look up: he peered towards the door with one eye through the slit of his fingers.

"Sorry to interrupt," KT began slowly, shyly even. She pushed the door open and took an apprehensive step inside the room. "But are you okay?"

The boy didn't get up to meet her or move for that matter. He closed his one visible eye, shielding himself away from her. This was embarrassing, behaving this way, but he had the right to sulk and mope and grieve—he was even on the verge of tears.

KT heard his voice mumble something but his hands blocked her from understanding him. She chuckled softly to herself.

"Maybe you should try talking without your hands covering your mouth. People would be able to understand you more clearly."

Suddenly the boy slammed his hands down on his thighs and stared up at her, irritation evident on his face.

"I don't think I need to explain anything to a person I don't even know," he snapped quickly. KT saw the hurt in his brown eyes. His deep, warm, brown eyes…she knew instantly that this was not the boy's normal behavior. The immense pain he was in was causing him to react this way. That was understandable, but KT stood her ground. She wanted to help, not anger him more. She wanted him to feel happy, not worse than he already did. She placed her hands on her hips and glared at him just as fiercely.

"Sorry for caring," she retorted boldly. KT had a small smile resting on her face. The boy raised an eyebrow in surprise. He was surprised by her bravado—not many people could handle a moody Fabian Rutter, even if it was a rare sight to endure. When Fabian was upset, the whole world knew. He was also surprised at himself for snapping at her like that. He didn't even know who she was…

…but he did know that she was a person with a big heart if she was willing to reach out to a complete stranger like that.

"I-I am _so_ sorry," he managed to blurt out. He stood up from his chair and rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "I didn't mean to come across so—so—"

"Grouchy? Abrasive? Rude?" She taunted lightly. She let her hands drop from her hips and land on her thighs. "It's cool. Sometimes we need to let our feelings out, right?"

Fabian shrugged and gave a half-smile. KT giggled at his geekish persona. It was refreshing after the encounter she had had earlier with some American guy telling her he had seen her in his dreams before and his obvious British ex-girlfriend shooting daggers at her during dinner. This boy seemed sweet and friendly; he was just having a bad day.

"So, wanna explain what why you're in your room moping away while the rest of the members of this crazy house are out celebrating the first day back?" KT asked him nicely.

Fabian released a little laugh. (KT liked the sound.) He stuffed his hands in his pockets. "I think I'd like to know you're name first. I'm not too comfortable explaining how my best friend/girlfriend broke up with me through the means of a letter and isn't returning here for school with a total stranger."

KT was the one to laugh now. He was blunt, but in a charming way. She threw her head back and Fabian noticed her curly hair flew this way and that. She was pretty, he thought, through her appearance but more so her personality.

(But not as pretty as a certain American girl he knew all too well…)

KT stuck her hand out towards him. "I'm KT Rush. I just moved in to Anubis House and according to the cranky redhead out there, I'm replacing the previous American girl…" KT closed her eyes and cringed as the realization slammed itself into her. She pulled her hand away. "Who must be your—"

"It's okay," Fabian interrupted swiftly. He didn't want her to finish that sentence. It still hurt. "You didn't know; no harm done. I'm actually feeling a bit better."

"Are you really?" KT asked hesitantly. She felt awful. She was sure off to a great start with making new friends…Fabian took one hand out of his pocket and waved her words off.

"Really really." He told her and she couldn't help the smile that broke out on her face. She was pretty sure she just made her first new friend. It felt great, amazing even. KT offered her hand back to Fabian's.

"Let me start over," she said determinedly. "I'm KT Rush. I just moved in to Anubis House and I'm very glad to have made a new friend."

Fabian smiled and put his hand in hers. "I'm Fabian Rutter. I've been living in Anubis Hosue since I was a freshman and I'm very glad to have made a new friend as well."

They shook hands.

What should have been a simple, friendly gesture felt different to KT.

_She felt sparks. _

What should have been a simple, friendly gesture felt just as it should have to Fabian.

He felt kindness.

They both shook hands longer than they should have.

* * *

**Two**

It was during a Sibuna expedition when their hands met again.

KT, Fabian and Eddie (the dream guy/Sibuna leader) were inspecting a human-sized tank in the attic of the gatehouse. This whole "mystery thing" was totally new to KT. There weren't ancient houses that had multiple curses thrown upon them back in Philadelphia. There weren't "teachers" posing as teachers in her old school who were actually trying to bring a man back to life. She guessed that was just a British thing. Until now, she thought she was an ordinary seventeen-year-old girl who had been given the dream of a lifetime to move to England and start her life all over again.

However, that dream could have been interpreted as a nightmare since she was now the girl with the key, currently boarding at creepy towers and working with four other kids to stop a supposed zombie from waking up evil.

She started to doubt what normal really was.

KT slowly inspected the tank. It loomed over her, as if it were actually staring into her soul, reading her every thought, viewing every secret she kept hidden from the public eye.

Her eyes darted over to Fabian, her dear friend, once she thought that this tank really was somewhat alive. Fabian was inspecting a sarcophagus-looking contraption on the other side of the room. He was okay, safe from the tank's invisible, all knowing eyes. KT looked back towards it and exhaled loudly. This was a _tank_: she felt silly that an inanimate object could see or think. She may be investigating a curse, which still sounded a little farfetched, but she knew _only humans_ could talk. Besides, KT didn't keep secrets. She had nothing to hide.

(Or maybe she did; she just didn't recognize it yet.)

Eddie tapped his fingers on the glass. KT slapped his arm, distraught over this action.

"A little respect, maybe?" She scolded him as if he were a toddler. Fabian chuckled under his breath. Oh that friend of his. KT was the sweetest person he had ever met, and the most loving. He would never forget how she comforted him when he was mourning over his and Nina's breakup. She was so supportive, so compassionate, a great friend to have. He was lucky to have met her. However, she was also extremely bold and outgoing: if she thought something was wrong or felt strongly about an issue, she was going to let you know, whether you wanted to listen or not.

Fabian walked back over and patted her on the shoulder. KT smiled and he smiled back.

Eddie still poked around the tank. "Wonder what this does," he said more to himself rather than to his Sibuna members. He leaned forward to press something and thankfully Fabian noticed.

"No Eddie! We don't know what that does," Fabian tried to convince the new leader. He stepped in front of KT to get a better look at his friend. "We have to approach this slowly and logically."

"How are we supposed to figure things out if we don't experiment?" Eddie explained hurriedly. Before Fabian could say that was totally _illogical_ reasoning, Eddie had pressed a button on the tank.

Steam instantly poured out of it and a loud siren-like sound blasted all around the small room. Acting on instinct, KT reached out to grab both her friends' hands to pull them away from the monstrous, inhuman thing. She wasn't going to let them get hurt; this was her mission after all.

(Her hand reached _his _first.)

KT squeezed their hands tightly as they stood against the wall opposite the frenzied tank. She was scared out of her mind about what would happen next. She didn't sign up for any of this when she booked her flight here or accepted her scholarship…oh was she scared. Denby could come up here any minute and bust them. Maybe even expel them! How could she face her parents if that happened? Oh my goodness was KT scared—

Fabian squeezed her hand back. He knew how frightening Sibuna could be. He was a veteran when it came to the supernatural, life-threatening situations and tasks he was somehow apart of: the Cup of Ankh and the Mask of Anubis prepared him well. He just hoped his dear friend KT was truly ready for this commitment, the danger, the risks that were in the future.

(Although he knew she was; she was exceptionally daring.)

KT looked over at him once she felt that squeeze. She took one look at him and their eyes met, brown against brown. He had this gentle look in his eyes, she thought. It was as if he was letting her know that it was okay to be afraid, that being brave meant feeling fear and accepting it so it wouldn't take completely over. KT nodded her head, understanding their silent form of communication. She didn't feel scared anymore.

Fabian smiled. She was so strong.

KT smiled. He was so wonderful.

Their hands stayed locked together until Eddie had managed to turn off the tank.

There were those _sparks_ again…

(Maybe KT Rush did have something to hide…)

* * *

**Three**

The Graduation Dance—that was the third time their hands embraced the other.

KT could not have been more proud, more excited, more ecstatic that she and Sibuna stopped evil Frobisher-Smythe and the Egyptian god Ra from making the human race into sinners. How many high school seniors could say they did all that _and _pass high school with straight As while at it?

_Few_ from what she knew.

KT sat with Eddie at the table one spot over from Fabian and Mara. She knew eavesdropping wasn't very polite, but she couldn't help herself from listening. Eddie was sulking about losing his powers, so he wasn't too joyful and Patricia wasn't around to cheer him up in the way only she could. Fabian looked pretty into his conversation with Mara; KT didn't want to interrupt.

She watched them instead.

KT kind of wanted to be sitting where Mara was.

Was she jealous? No, she couldn't be! If anything, KT saw Mara and Fabian getting together from the beginning. They were both geniuses, very loyal, incredibly fun to be around…

They were just _lovely _together.

(So why did her stomach twist when Mara put the valedictorian medal over Fabian's neck?)

Fabian was her dear friend: KT wanted him to be happy in any way possible. So if that meant Mara Jaffray would put the smile on his face that deserved to be there, then so be it. That was totally okay with KT. It didn't bug her one bit. Nope. Nada. She and Fabian were _just friends_—

"Guys," KT found herself leaning in between Fabian and Mara, practically pulling them away from their first kiss together. She got up from her table? She didn't even know she was doing so—she was so wrapped up in her thoughts. What was she doing? This was horrible! Fabian deserved to be happy! Out of everyone here, it would be Fabian she was rooting for to find eternal happiness.

But she couldn't stop herself. She was cursing herself as she heard herself speak aloud. "We just graduated. So let's celebrate!" She told them in this sickly sweet voice that she didn't know she had in her. To top it all off, she even made a crazy squeal to try and make it seem like it the adrenaline of the events earlier had gotten the best of her and that pushing the two lovebirds apart was totally accidental. It was though, wasn't it? KT would never do something that rude, that cruel. She wanted all her friends to find true love and live in the moment and experience the joys of being a teenager before it was ripped away from them.

So why was she destroying Fabian and Mara's chances?

Especially Fabian's?

Completely embarrassed now, KT ran away from them onto the dance floor. Mabe if she started dancing with her other friends, they would distract her from her abundant thoughts. She twirled around with Joy and Willow for a while. When she had a clear view of Fabian and Mara, she thought they looked like they hadn't noticed at all how her emotions were raging and that she didn't know why she was behaving like such.

Really now, KT asked herself, why was she getting so worked up that Fabian was falling for Mara?

_Oh gosh._

KT stopped dancing and stood directly in the middle of the dance floor. Her heart fell to the tips of her toes and her breathing quickened. Joy and Jerome danced around her, as did Willow and Alfie, not noticing how their friend came to the realization that would change her relationship with her dear friend for the rest of her life. She looked over at Fabian's table again, but did not see him or Mara sitting there. She bit her lip nervously and she felt a little dizzy with this new information; she swayed a little in her tall heels. How did KT not recognize that she had feelings for Fabian this whole entire time? Oh goodness! What was she to do now—

"_Earth to Kara Tatiana Rush!"_ Fabian Rutter bellowed. He waved a hand in front of her face. KT blinked rapidly and turned to look at her dear friend.

(If she could even call him that anymore without her cheeks blushing.)

Fabian stood there, looking concerned. "Everything okay?"

KT didn't know how to answer that question because there was no right answer. No, everything was not okay: Fabian liked Mara. Fabian was her dear friend—_only_ her dear friend. She didn't want to risk their friendship if she told him how she felt. However, yes, everything was okay: she…she had never felt so _good_ before, so free actually. KT had discovered a new side of herself, and admitting these feelings—if only to herself—was a gutsy decision to make. She looked at him, her brown eyes against his, and she smiled to herself.

It was like she was looking at a brand new person.

Maybe KT Rush did have some teensy feelings for her dear friend, but he still was, after all, her dear friend. Nothing would ever change that (she hoped.)

Besides, maybe these feelings were just a one-time thing. It could be, she thought. Maybe she felt this way because Fabian looked so good in a tux, or how he was choosing to dance with her instead of Mara, or sticking with her through thick and thin this whole entire year?

_Aw, whom was she kidding?_

The music changed to one of their favorite songs. KT pulled herself away from her wild thoughts. Tonight wasn't about drama and she certainly didn't want to create any. Tonight was about being seventeen-years-old, acting crazy and ridiculous with the best friends she has ever had, and celebrating the fact that they weren't high school kids anymore, but rather soon-to-be college freshmen.

Tonight she would not give in. She stood up to her feelings, disobeyed what her heart wanted her to do and listened to her head instead.

Now _that_ was gutsy.

She held out her hand. "May I have this dance, Mr. Rutter?"

Fabian smiled.

KT smiled.

Fabian put his hand in hers and felt that same kindness he felt at the beginning of the year. KT was such a wonderful person, a marvelous friend to have. He was blessed to have her and to be the one leading her in this dance.

KT didn't feel sparks when their fingers locked together.

These were _fireworks._

* * *

**Four**

Two years passed before their hands looked for each other again.

_Knock, knock, knock…knock, knock, KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK! KNOCK! _

KT groggily sat up in her bed. Who could possibly be pounding on her door this late at night? She looked at her alarm clock. It read 12:01 am.

Correction: who could possibly be pounding on her door this _early_ in the morning? KT debated whether to get up and deal with this lunatic or snuggle back under her covers, put her pillow over her head and fall back asleep. She was just about to decide on the latter when she heard sniffles coming from the other side of the door.

Immediately she shot out of her bed, slid her feet into her fuzzy slippers and went to the door. She couldn't stand to see or hear people upset, even those she'd never even met before. No way would she turn this person away now; she even felt horrible for thinking about going back to sleep. That calculus test had just drained her though—who knew college would be so difficult?

KT turned her dorm room knob to the right and swung her door open to find a tear stricken Fabian gazing down at her.

Now she _really_ hated herself for wanting to turn him away.

"Oh Fabian," she cooed gently, her eyes softening at the sight of him. His brown eyes were leaking thick, blue tears and his eyes were puffy and red. She wrapped her arm around his shoulders and guided him towards her bed. Fabian was always so open about how he was feeling; he wasn't afraid to cry and have people see. KT felt honored that he had decided to come to her, chosen her to confide in, wanted her to know what was causing him to feel so awful.

Her cheeks began to turn red again.

(She really had to get that under control or one day her dear friend would notice.)

"What happened?" She asked softly, not wanting to pry too much. She sat beside him on her bed. He sniffed loudly and refused to meet her in the eye for some reason.

"M-Mara and I…w-we…we ended it j-j-just now, KT," he told her, taking large breaths to try and steady himself. He felt bad for waking her up but he…he really, really needed someone to speak with. "I th-thought it was going so well, we were s-so happy I thought, but I, I g-guess she wasn't happy."

"Did she give you a reason?" KT wondered. She rubbed his back comfortingly.

(She'd be lying if she said she didn't enjoy their close proximity right now.)

"Something about not having as much time to spend with each other, I don't know." He mumbled. He wiped his nose on his pajama sleeve. "I guess I can understand, sort of. College life has been difficult and really stressful. Having a relationship now, especially with our conflicting, busy class schedules and majors, we weren't hanging out as often as I thought we were."

He took an unsteady, shaky breath and more tears fled from his eyes. Fabian finally turned to look at KT, and she thought she was about to shed tears of her own. There was so much pain coloring his eyes.

"Twice now, KT," he said softly. "Twice now, it's happened."

KT was confused. She didn't want to say it out loud because she feared it would hurt him more having to explain. He unfortunately understood why she was so silent.

"I've had my heart broken twice…and it still hurts just the same."

Fabian leaned over and buried his face in her shoulder. Tears were staining her sleeve, but heck, she didn't care. KT continued to rub his back in small little circles. In fact, her mind was running in circles as well. She oh so desperately wanted to say something along the lines of "if _we_ were more than friends, I'd never do such a horrible thing."

Something stopped her every time she got close to actually going through with it. What if KT finally did say something that hinted at her true feelings? Most likely, her and Fabian's friendship would crumble into little tiny specks, unable to ever be repaired. His friendship meant the world to her and she felt so blessed to have even that. No way would she ever put it in jeopardy.

That was why she tried to repress her feelings. By doing so, she got to continue to enjoy the beautiful relationship they already possessed. Besides, what if they never had worked out…as a couple? Fabian would probably never feel comfortable enough to come talk to her like how he was now ever again. She didn't want to risk it.

(Even though half of her really wanted to try.)

Sometimes being strong and putting others first was hard, she thought. The selfish way out seemed so enticing…

KT Rush was nobler than that.

So she reached out and slipped her free hand into one of Fabian's and gave it one good squeeze.

He squeezed back.

* * *

**Five**

They held hands three years later.

(It was the last time.)

KT absolutely, one hundred percent, loved her life. It was plain and simple. She had graduated college only a year ago, with her best friends at her side, and also possessed the greatest job. She was teaching at her old high school, business studies to be exact. It was great working in a place that constantly brought her so many good memories of her and her friendships, Sibuna, and her great-grandpa (when he was good of course.) So many good emotions tagged along with them; she smiled to herself.

She even worked alongside some of her friends: Joy was the new Head Mistress after Sweetie retired; Eddie took over his father's job as the science teacher; and Fabian worked in the Frobisher-Smythe Library, educating students of the school's rich connection to Egyptian history every single day. He and KT had gotten their dream jobs.

(Working along side Fabian was definitely a _plus_.)

Currently, KT was walking to her favorite coffee shop. It was a cool autumn morning and though she never really got used to the chilly British seasons, KT felt so good. She smiled again when her scarf flew up and tickled her nose. Not even the brisk wind, frost or cold weather could bring her down today. It probably had something to do with Fabian meeting her for breakfast.

What was even better was that _he_ asked _her_.

Wait, did this mean this was a _date_? Like a real, actual, boy-likes-girl, girl-likes-boy kind of thing? KT was originally happy just be spending the morning with her dear friend…

But now she was even _more ecstatic_ with this new revelation.

As she walked, KT pondered if she had noticed any strange behavior from Fabian lately due to him possibly having different feelings for his "dear friend."

They ate lunch together ever day at work, that was something. However, they ate along with Eddie and Joy. Sometimes Patricia, Alfie, Willow, Mara and Jerome would even stop by to eat a meal with them and chat like they were young again. They weren't ever alone at work.

She ruled out lunch dates.

On some Saturday nights, Fabian and KT would go down to the pier and simply walk around and talk. Although they never really talked about their love lives unless something had drastically changed within them, like back when Fabian and Mara had broken up. They would play some of the fair games that were occasionally set up or just sit on the edge of the pier and watch the sea and sky meet and form the horizon. It was cliché, KT understood that, but nothing that was usually associated with watching the sunset ever happened. No shoulder hugs, actual hugs or (gosh forbid!) _kissing_ ever took place. They just sat there and would bump shoulders every now and then when one tried to make a corny joke. It was nice, hanging out with him like that…but none of those nights had ever screamed: "date."

She ruled that out too.

Maybe Fabian was the type of guy who acted like himself to try and get girls—yeah, that sounded logical to KT. It worked on her after all: she loved his nerdy, caring, loyal personality—everything that made him _him_, she loved lots (in friendly and romantic way.)

Then again, Fabian was never one to actually _notice_ when girls liked him. He probably didn't even try to go out to try and impress them.

(Examples: Joy, Nina, _KT_)

Whatever, she thought, brushing away all her imposing thoughts. KT was going to have a nice morning with him, whether it was an actual date or not.

She approached the coffee shop and readjusted her scarf and beanie before she went inside. She instantly saw Fabian wave his hand to greet her, his smile looking through the roof. KT smiled and waved back.

She made her way to his booth by the large window on the other side of the cafe. Fabian got up to give her a hug, which she gladly returned (they hugged for a little too long, but she wasn't going to complain.) KT took her seat opposite him and noticed how Fabian had already ordered her her favorite expresso drink.

"Aw thanks," she said, gratefully taking the warm mug into her frozen hands. She took a sip and some foam landed on her nose. Fabian laughed. She blushed.

(Not as badly as she used too; she had learned to control it [somewhat.])

"You're welcome." He said after his giggles died down. "And thank you for meeting with me on such short notice. I meant to ask you yesterday at work, but I was completely booked with classes coming into the library. I don't even know how I ended up home!"

"It's no problem," KT told him. She'd always have time to spend with her dear friend Fabian…

Fabian cleared his throat and folded his hands on top of the table. "I actually wanted to ask you something. It's a bit more personal, so I wanted it to just be the two of us. Not that I didn't want Eddie or Joy to know, I'm going to tell them too, it's just—well, you see—"

"Fabes, you're rambling," KT interrupted with a chuckle. His face blushed in slight embarrassment, but he never really felt embarrassed when around KT. It was something he loved about his dear friend: she allowed him to feel whatever he wanted and allowed him to express it all openly. She was a dear, dear friend of his.

Which is why he valued her opinion so much.

"Sorry," he said sheepishly, but smiled nevertheless. He cleared his throat again and looked down at his hands. "So I, uh, know this girl—"

KT's breath caught in her throat. Oh. My. Gosh. Was this really where she thought it was going? She really hoped so, but didn't want to get her hopes up too high just yet. She did straighten her posture and looked down to see if her scarf wasn't lopsided again.

"Uh huh," she said slowly, trying to urge him forward. She desperately needed to know what he was going to say because she knew it would change their lives forever.

" We've known each other for a while now," Fabian continued. He unfolded his hands and rubbed his neck. "We've had really strong connections during high school a-and she's stuck her neck out for me and for Sibuna."

KT nervously and excitedly sipped on her coffee, believing that if she were to stop, she'd sputter out words all too soon. Fabian was talking about her in a "not-so-secretive" code that Sibuna members were famous for. Of course she'd know that because she was in Sibuna and she and Fabian had an unbreakable bond that they both cherished greatly.

So far, it was all making sense.

Deep breaths, KT, she told herself.

She continued to drink her coffee.

"I know we've had our ups and downs…especially in my last year, but I can't just sit around anymore, you know?" Fabian finally met KT in the eye. He looked exhilarated at just the mention of her, the one he knew he wanted to be with. "I would never be able to forgive myself if I let her slip away without even trying to see if we would work together when I really believe we could."

"…I-I completely agree." KT managed to choke out. Her voice was soft although her heart was pumping much too hard. Fabian had been fighting with the same desires KT had had all along. She had never told him of her feelings for the fear of them losing their friendship or the fear of crashing and burning. She thought she was strong for listening to her head and putting Fabian first…apparently Fabian was behaving the same way.

(That was it: they were perfect for each other, she thought with a smile.)

Fabian's eyes lit up. He sat up straighter and smiled wide.

"I'm so glad to hear that!" He said enthusiastically. "One of the reasons why I wanted to tell you first is because of how everyone else might react. "

Okay, that made KT confused. Why would their friends react badly to her and Fabian getting together? They had always been supportive and understanding people.

"What do you mean?" She asked, putting her now empty mug back onto the tabletop.

"Well, things were pretty rocky during senior year," Fabian said with a shrug. He was over that pain now: it had been taken over by the bravery of simply trying again. "I had thought they would find me completely mad by wanting to ask her out because of her not telling me about _it_; she put me through a lot of sleepless nights and stress you know. I'm sure Eddie heard me whine about her late at night, and Patricia and Alfie know how much I like her, as did Joy. I still feel bad about not realizing Joy liked me that whole time…"

"I-I'm sorry," KT interjected with a shaky breath. She put one elbow on the table and raised her hand to stop his rambling. "But you've lost me, Fabes. Not…not telling you about what?" KT had thought their relationship was absolutely flawless.

(Well, expect for the lying about how much she liked him part.)

Oh gosh, was _that_ what would upset their friends? KT not telling Fabian she liked him this whole time? KT never knew her friends had known about her crush! Now she was very embarrassed and still awfully confused to how that all happened. She was upset that she had upset Fabian her senior year; KT should have just told him the truth. Maybe they would be together now if she had, holding hands over the coffee table, acting all happy-go-lucky and such…

Now Fabian was the one to look confused. "You don't remember?"

KT slowly shook her head no. Her confidence of a future relationship with this man was dwindling down, down, down. As much as KT liked to make people feel good and happy with themselves, she liked feeling that way as well. It was no fun to be on the edge like this.

KT just wanted a happy life. A life that consisted of her and Fabian Rutter. Together.

(That would be so nice.)

"When she didn't tell me she wasn't coming back," Fabian explained, leaning forward a tad bit. "She had to stay away from Anubis because of Eddie being the Osirian and her the Chosen One."

KT's heart plummeted to the tips of her toes. She leaned back against the booth with a thump. Her mouth hung open, but not enough for Fabian to know that he had just crushed all the hope of them she ever held on to into tiny little pieces. How could she have been so stupid, she thought? Fabian had never once shown any type of romantic interest in her whatsoever. There was no way Fabian Rutter would ever like KT Rush because… because…

…because Fabian Rutter was still madly in love with Nina Martin.

(The other American girl.)

KT knew she must have looked like an idiot sitting there: she hadn't responded to Fabian yet. She tried to form words, but her mouth only moved in the formation of them. Her voice had vanished. She pressed a hand to her mouth and blinked hard to push away a few stinging tears from forming. KT only had to blink once though.

Over the years, she had become an expert on how to hide her true emotions from Fabian Rutter.

KT had to say something. Fabian was staring at her intently. She felt so uncomfortable and so pathetic that she let her hope escalate this high. Someone once told her that having hope, belieing in faith, expecting the impossible to happen was a lovely thing to do, because no one ever really knew if it would come true or not.

Today…today KT learned that having hope only hurt ten times worse.

"KT?" Fabian finally said, breaking the long silence. "What's wrong? Did I say something to upset you or—"

"No!" KT shouted loudly. "No, you didn't." Her voice had reappeared, causing the other people in the café to stare. She ignored them. All KT could do was look at her dear friend Fabian.

A dear friend…that was all he would ever be…a dear friend.

KT had the urge to tell him everything: how she had thanked God everyday for finding him heartbroken over Nina when she arrived at Anubis House. If it hadn't been for their breakup, they may not have ever had the deep bond they had now. She wanted to tell him how she felt sparks when they shook hands and how it only magnified as the years went on until finally her emotions revealed to her that she liked him more than a friend. KT wanted him to realize that she had been here for him for years now, while Nina was off somewhere he didn't know where in America, doing who knew what and with whom with.

Out of everything though, KT wanted to reach out and grab Fabian's hand and never let him go.

But she didn't do any of those things: KT liked seeing her friends happy. Especially Fabian. She knew the selfish way was the easy way out; she could possibly get what she wanted this time if she only spoke up.

The easy way was never the right way. KT knew that all too well. Being selfless and courageous was the right thing to do.

(But it was so difficult sometimes…)

KT was going to be valiant again—she was going to put on a smile, reach her hand out for Fabian's and hold it comfortingly. She was going to support her dear friend's ambition to locate his long, lost love and reconcile the mess she had made between them. With Eddie's powers gone, Nina could even come back to England to be with Fabian. Fabian's life would turn out for the better if he was to find Nina and fix everything. KT knew that.

And that's exactly what she did.

Fabian took KT's hand and squeezed it tighter than anytime before. Once more, he was so incredibly blessed to know and call Miss Kara Tatianna Rush his most dear friend in the entire universe. He was relived that she understood why he wanted to connect with Nina again—she made him feel confident that everything would work out in his favor in the end. She was the most courageous person he knew, in more ways than he could ever explain.

(Or would ever know.)

"_KT, you are magic,"_ he told her softly. He gave her the sweetest smile he'd ever given her before.

KT returned the smile;

She squeezed his hand.

(The sparks and fireworks had disappeared.)

* * *

**Five Years Later**

"She's beautiful," the twenty-seven-year-old KT heard Joy Clarke dreamily tell the pregnant Patricia Miller. KT sat with two of her friends at a circular, white table-clothed table. There were multiple other tables in the large hotel ballroom, all occupied by family and friends. A few women—including KT, Joy, and Patricia—each wore the same knee-length, turquoise dress (however Patricia's dress was much more flowy due to her five month pregnant belly.) They all were here for the same reason. "And I haven't seen him beam like this in ages."

"Eh," Patricia said through a mouth full of the steak entrée, "it's Fabian. When isn't he smiling?"

"You know what I mean, Trixie," Joy scolded lightly. She let her best friend eat and feed her growing stomach and turned to converse with KT who was watching the happy couple twirl on the dance floor.

"I'm so glad she asked you to be one of her bridesmaids," Joy commented. KT looked away from the spinning two and met Joy's face.

"Hmm? Oh yeah," she agreed. "We've gotten to be good friends since she moved back to Liverpool three years ago. I like her a lot and I was honored when she asked me. It was wonderful standing up there with her, you two, Mara, Willow, and Amber."

It was true: KT Rush and Nina Martin had a lot in common. They were both American, loved warm weather, enjoyed a good mystery (either a real one or fictional ones found in books), would do anything for their friends…

…were _both_ in love with Fabian Rutter…

"See Patricia?" Joy said with a giggle. "Americans are nice and friendly!" Joy shook Patricia's arm, causing her to drop her fork. Joy laughed harder while Patricia raised an eyebrow in amusement.

"I think you've had a little too much champagne." Patricia stated wisely. KT nodded her head in agreement. Patricia sighed. "Come on, Joy. Let's find that husband of yours to help you sober up."

Patricia stood up and lead a giggly Joy away from the table. KT now sat by herself. She was thankful to have a few minutes alone so she could think and reflect on today.

KT looked back out at Mr. and Mrs. Rutter dancing to their song. Joy was right: Nina was absolutely stunning. She wore a rather plain wedding gown, but its simplicity made Nina shine more than she already did. She wore light make-up and her hair was in a crisp, intricate bun. She even wore her Eye of Horus necklace around her neck; the pendent was tucked away under her dress, but those from Anubis House were the only ones to recognize that chain and its history behind it.

Today had been a wonderful day, KT admitted to herself. It was great to reconnect with her friends again—some had moved away from Liverpool so she didn't see them too much. It was amazing to hear how everyone was doing with their lives: Amber now ran the biggest fashion line in America, Eddie and Patricia were expecting twins, Joy and Jerome had recently tied the knot, Mick and Mara had rekindled their relationship when Mara moved to Australia to begin her science foundation, and Alfie and Willow were just…Alfie and Willow. They hadn't changed much to say the least.

However, KT didn't come to this wedding to focus on their lives.

"Joy was right," KT mumbled to herself. She was now looking at her dear friend of hers. He was twirling Nina under his arm. KT hadn't once seen that smile leave his face. "He hasn't ever been this happy."

Not even with her…

She blinked once and the tears went away.

KT truly was happy for Fabian. That was all she ever wanted: to see him feeling this good about himself and his life. Fabian deserved it. Fabian deserved to love the girl that made him feel like he was flying.

And that wasn't KT.

It was Nina.

It was ridiculous, KT thought, to still have feelings for Fabian. She honestly thought they would have gone away once Fabian told her he got Nina to go out with him again, or when he announced she was moving to Liverpool to live with him, or when he showed her the fancy ring he bought for Nina to propose with.

It was true: the feelings were still there. Maybe it was because of Fabian not knowing. Since he didn't know, he continued on with his and KT's relationship like nothing had happened. Because nothing had happened, she thought to herself. They continued to hang out together. There were moments when KT forgot about her feelings for a while, and would hang around Fabian Rutter as the dear friends that he was to her.

Somehow, no matter how hard she resented those feelings, they always crept back into her heart.

She'd always push them further and further away.

It was for the better, she thought. For the better—

_"Earth to Kara Tatiana Rush!"_ Fabain Rutter said loudly. KT blinked in shock. There was the groom, standing right in front of her chair, looking down at her in confusion. KT shook her head full of curls and coughed.

"W-what?" she asked him, just as confused.

Fabian laughed. "Reminds me of our graduation."

KT couldn't hold back the smile. That was an eventful night…"Me too."

She stood up and gave him a hug and told him: "congratulations!" Fabian wrapped his arms tightly around her slender waist. This woman had been at his side through it all; she was his rock, his Sibuna member, his shoulder to cry on, his dance partner, his dearest friend in the world.

There wasn't anyone else in the world he would call his dearest friend. The status already belonged to and would always belong to KT Rush.

They hugged for too long, like they usually did, until KT finally pulled away. She looked at him, brown eyes against brown eyes, and she saw the man behind all that hurt he once felt back in senior year—the man that was there all along.

She saw her dear friend.

And she was okay with that.

"I requested our favorite song to be played so we could dance to it together," Fabian told her jovially. He gestured to the dance floor that was currently occupied by most of the Anubis residents (all except Eddie and Patricia; they were never ones for dancing and since she was pregnant, that certainly was not going to happen today.) "Just you and me, like old times."

KT heard the music over the loudspeakers, how it was slow at first until it unexpectedly picked up to a rapid beat and continued that way until it suddenly deflated back it its original, slow tempo. She never knew why she and Fabian liked it so much; she guessed it fit them well.

"What do you say?" Fabian asked her happily.

He held his hand out for her to take.

Her breath caught in her throat.

She had to make a choice: clasp on or let go.

The choice was obvious and she accepted the repercussions of her actions. It was what she and Fabian both needed.

"Thanks, but I'm okay," she said softly, giving him the sweetest smile she'd ever given him. "I'd rather you go dance with your wife and be happy with her."

Fabian was a little taken aback by her response.

But he smiled.

He lowered his hand and leaned forward to kiss her on the cheek.

_"KT, you are magic,"_ he whispered ever so lightly as he pulled back from her. "Never forget that, okay?"

KT nodded. She cleared her throat and shook her curls once more.

"Well what are you doing here talking to little ole me?" She questioned playfully. "Go dance with your wife!"

Fabian laughed as she gave him a playful shove towards the dance floor. He took a few steps forward, but looked back at his dear friend. She waved at him.

He waved back.

(She truly was magic.)

Fabian Rutter ventured off to find his newly made wife.

KT stood there for a few seconds before flattening the hem of her dress and sitting back down at the table. She rested the palms of her hands on her thighs. She inhaled deeply through her nose and closed her eyes. She released her breath and opened her eyes to find Fabian back with Nina. He was kissing her forehead gently.

KT smiled.

Courage, that was what KT Rush possessed. It wasn't from fighting off sinners or defeating the sun god Ra and saving the world. No, it was because of something much bigger than that.

It was from letting go.

* * *

**WOW THAT WAS REALLY LONG! WAY LONGER THAN I HAD ANTICIPATED! I hope you all enjoyed it :)**

**Read and review pretty please :)**


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